Military Intelligence?

So you're going to think that I'm making this up, but my journalism students are doing a story on a number of Gunderson students who have joined the military in recent months. In doing so, they are doing interviews with recruiters from the various branches of the Armed Forces, who have a mild presence on the GHS campus.

So I'm reading through the list of quotes, and I see that one of the names of the Army Recruiters is:

Moron Ditzler

I turned to my students, "Steven. You're telling me that there is an Army recruiter whose legal name is Moron?"
Steven took out the guy's business card, complete with Army logo. He had it correct.

No wonder the guy went into the military.