Notes, Quotes and Billy Goats

Time for Notes, Quotes and Billy Goats:

Bumper Sticker
I saw a bumper sticker that I'd never seen before the other day. It said:
"I'm personally pro-life, but politically pro-choice. - Pontius Pilate"

Tolerance
My wife and I have been having some rigorous and confusing conversations lately about the word and concept "tolerance." It's become a big Christian buzz word no-no, I've found. But I don't know what it means, exactly. There are a few different definitions in the dictionary, which doesn't help. One definition is "the capacity for or the practice of recognizing and respecting the beliefs or practices of others." I think, on one side, that's a good and healthy thing. You shouldn't go around, you know, lynching people because you don't like something they believe.

But it's also defined as: "leeway or deviation from a standard." Which I think is what some folks think of when they think of tolerance. God sets the standard for what is okay to do, and if you break from that, you're on dangerous ground.

My point is this: at the core of tolerance is a kind of "intolerance." You tolerate someone's behavior, but it still bugs the crap out of you. Nicole's point is how do you love somebody without accidentally sending the message that "Hey, what you're doing is okay!"

And more importantly, what does God think of all this? At the core of God is an astounding amount of intolerance because of His attributes of Holiness. But at the core of God is also a tremendous amount of patience for sin - as evidenced in both Old Testament texts and our own lives.

Aye, Aye, Cap'n
Nicole and I went out to a nearby lake yesterday to visit her grandparents. Her grandparents own a small cabin-like thing on a 40-acre campsite area that's right on a small lake in Michigan. Justus got to go on his first boat ride with his great-grandfather, who was in the coast guard which means that he was eminately qualified to drive a pontoon boat with a 45 HP motor. I also swam out to a floating dock a hundred yards off shore, or so, and dove in the water, fearful, the entire time about sharks. Which is ridiculous, because it's a fresh water isolated spring-fed reservoir. But still.

You Came From Where?
The biggest news of the day is that this Sunday, Nicole and I and Justus and her mom and step-dad are piling in their Honda CRV and driving 3 hours to Grand Rapids to attend the Sunday worship experience at Mars Hill Bible Church, which is home to my idol, Rob Bell. I'm totally excited. For me, going to see good preachers is like going to see a rock concert. Only better. Believe, me, I've seen Bryan Adams in concert and he's no match for Erwin McManus. This is totally going to make my vacation.

Afterwards, we're going to drive in dune buggys over the sand dunes, which sounds to me like a big invitation to taste grit for the rest of the weekend, but could also be a lot of fun.

Provocative Lyrics...

I found this song. Here are the lyrics. What do you think of them?

BREATHE DEEP
from the album "Scenic Routes"
Music and lyrics by Terry Taylor

Politicians, morticians, Philistines, homophobes Skinheads, Dead heads, tax evaders, street kids Alcoholics, workaholics, wise guys, dim wits Blue collars, white collars, war mongers, peace nicks

Chorus
Breathe deep Breathe deep the Breath of God Breathe deep Breathe deep the Breath of God

Suicidals, rock idols, shut-ins, drop outs Friendless, homeless, penniless and depressed Presidents, residents, foreigners and aliens Dissidents, feminists, xenophobes and chauvinists

Chorus

Evolutionists, creationists, perverts, slum lords Dead-beats, athletes, Protestants and Catholics Housewives, neophytes, pro-choice, pro-life Misogynists, monogamists, philanthropists, blacks and whites

Chorus

Police, obese, lawyers, and government Sex offenders, tax collectors, war vets, rejects Atheists, Scientists, racists, sadists Biographers, photographers, artists, pornographers

Chorus

Gays and lesbians, demagogues and thespians The disabled, preachers, doctors and teachers Meat eaters, wife beaters, judges and jurys Long hair, no hair, everybody everywhere!

Chorus

In Michigan

So I'm in Michigan. We'll be spending the next week with Nicole's mom and step-dad. Thought I'd update you with some details.

Crazy Accident
On their way down to meet up with us half-way, Nicole's mom Terry and step-dad Rex got caught in this crazy traffic accident on I-75 heading south. Apparently, there was an accident in a construction zone that caused all traffic to be re-routed via backroads. Now, if you don't know I-75 is one of the largest traffic arteries in the nation, going from Michigan to Florida. So this was no small deal. Terry and Rex were in a stand-still for 2 hours.

On the way back, we drove on the other side of road right by the scene of the accident that backed up traffic for more than five miles and saw what happened. Apparently, a semi had hit something, run into something else, and exploded into flame. The only thing left when we drove by were two dump trucks full of charred metal debris. You could kind of see the outline of the trailer, but there wasn't much left. There was a road crew out fixing the road where the high heat had melted the concrete and asphalt.

We think the accident probably killed the driver, and they had to call in police and forensic scientists, which is why it took so long to open the road.

Crazy Rain
So the heatwave that has kept most of the midwest in a humid headlock for the past two weeks looks like it's finally dissapating. On our way to Michigan, we drove right into one of the biggest storm fronts I have ever seen. These thunderheads were just ginormous. It's about 20 degrees cooler here today than it was yesterday.

War of the Worlds
Nicole's parents live about two minutes from a movie theatre, so last night, we went to see War of the Worlds. Although it hasn't gotten great reviews, I went at the recommendation of my buddy Jeff Revenaugh. I'm not saying it's a great movie, like it didn't change my life, but I was entertained from start to finish. I mean, it's freakin' Speilberg, so it's gotta be masterful. And it was really creepy. Harvesting humans for their blood. Ick. The ending was a bit deus ex machina, which always bugs me, but it was really intense.

I thought the most provacative scenes - and if you haven't seen it, this won't ruin it for you - are on the ferry. Seeing the crowds and the mass hysteria. It was really unnerving. I wonder if Spielberg was attempting to say something bigger with this movie. I wonder if there were deeper themes that I was missing. Or if it's just fun sci-fi. I don't know. Lemme know if you get anything.

Grandma
So here's something I can add to my list of things I wished had never happened. Nicole and I got back from the movie last night at about 11:45. While she fed Justus, I got the room ready. And then I got ready to take a shower. So it's about 12:30, and I got out of the shower, and started drying off. Then the door opens, and it's Nicole's grandmother - who lives with Nicole's mom. The bathroom we were using is usually her bathroom, and it's usually empty. So she just kind of went in.

"Oh," she said. "I'm sorry. You go ahead."

"It's all right!" I said. Even though I didn't mean that. If she had actually come back in, I would have been surprised.

"What are you doing," I would have said, in a high-pitched voice.

"You said it was okay," she would have said.

"Yes, but I didn't mean it!"

The good news is, I think her eyesight is bad. But getting up in the middle of the night to see a giant naked white guy in your bathroom is probably enough to push anyone over that edge.

Baseball + Extreme Heat + Babies = Grueling Afternoon

Yesteday, my mom and dad and Nicole and Justus and I went downtown to Fifth Third Field in Downtown Dayton. As you may know, Fifth Third Field is the home of the Minor League Single-A Ballclub Farm Team the Dayton Dragons. It was the hottest day of the summer. And we were sitting outside. In the sun. Watching Single A baseball. Which is akin to watching non-playoff WNBA games in a sauna.

The game was actually loads of fun, though. The Dragons won 6-1, and I saw a home run, a triple, a steal, a diving catch at the warning track, a balk, and Dragon Jeremiah Piepkorn get caught looking and caught in a pickle, and then just level the second baseman like a linebacker hitting a punter. The second baseman for the other team didn't get up for like 4 minutes because he had the wind knocked out of him. It was pretty cool.

But I do have some questions, overall.

Fifth Third Field:
This is just confusing. Is it 5/3 of a field, like more than one and a half, but less than two fields? If so, it wasn't nearly big enough. Did it come in third five times in a row, or is it the bronze medal winner in the fifth heat?

Dayton Dragons:
Why Dragons? I can understand the University of Dayton Flyers, because of the Wright B. Flyer. And the IHL team the Dayton Bombers, because Wright Patterson AFB is nearby and made the Sealth Bomber. But the dragons? Are there a lot of moats around Dayton that I don't know about?

Heat Index:
They have this bizarre thing in Dayton called the heat index. Here is how it works. Yesterday, it was 97 degrees. But it was 85 percent humidity, which made it seem like it was 104. So how hot it is is NOT as hot as it is. If you live someplace where you need a heat index, here is my advice: move.

My buddy Jonathan referred in his blog about how I was having an idyllic vacation. I'm no so much a fan of the heat anymore.

Stepping in Front of Evil

So I’ve been thinking a lot about a post that my buddy, Kris (known heretofore as Chris), put up a few days ago. Chris is one of those guys whose points of views I have to respect, because it’s so different from mine and yet, so similar. He grew up in another country, saw the Communist rule, and then moved to America and saw a different kind of country. He has seen all sorts of stuff..

He wrote this post the other day, which has been rolling around in my head like that blasted Vonage commercial music (Who-hoo a-whoo-hoo-hoo. Repeat x 1000). Here is what Chris said:

Based on what Russell says, its pretty obvious that the guy is not a fan of Christians, and makes it a rather personal agenda to attack them as much as possible. This should neither shock nor surprise anyone, as Jesus made it clear that the world will hate his followers. What should however concern us are the world's attacks when we provide the ammunition.

Whether the guys is right or wrong is nearly besides the point. The lure of political power is undeniably strong within the Evangelicals these days. Though we are called to be salt and light for the world, I don’t think politics is the vehicle God had in mind to spread his message. There is a passage in the Gospels where Jesus says that if he actually wanted, the Father would send legions of angels to defend him and establish his kingdom. What he is saying ( the way I read this ) is that the Gospel will not 'muscle' its way into the world. He will not use political, military or any other human means to conquer the world. He needs hearts not votes.

It puzzles me how hard we push to make sure we have all the freedoms and comfort to practice our faith, while in most of the rest of the world the Church thrives in a hostile environment. Are we afraid of not being able to continue to follow Jesus if there is no more TBN, or NRB, or 700 Club? We better make sure that our faith is build on something more real than the 'status quo'.

We put so much effort into making our beliefs mainstream to ensure that no one frowns on our convictions, but how much effort do we put into actually showing a genuine love, care and compassion for the world? Mixing politics with religion is a sure recipe for disaster. And even though it might definitely get the world's attention to what we have to say, the message will be powerless, compromised by selling out to this or that political power or agenda. At least that's how I see it.

So here are the walking contradictions rolling around in my head. These are just stepping stones.

• Martin Luther King Jr’s political movement is categorically good. So was Ghandi’s. So intermixing politics and law and religious principles can be a good and powerful thing.

• All the military might in the world can’t stop terrorism. The USA has planes that could decimate any nation, any village, and group of insurgents. But we can’t stop the evil in Iraq. It just keeps popping up – in London, in Egypt, in Iraq. You can’t stop evil with an M16.

• Jesus calls His followers to stand up for what is right. As young boys, we are all attracted to heroes (like Batman, Zorro, Robin Hood, Superman, Spiderman) who have the strength and courage to stand up against evil, because that’s what heroes do. And part of our DNA – as John Eldridge would put it - is to be dangerously good.

• Political Power does not equal health for the church. The more the church is politically persecuted, the more fervent and the faster it grows. The more comfortable the church gets, the more it has to fight against laziness, self-centeredness and materialism. This was true, as my buddy Grant pointed out, even in the early church in Acts 6.

• History is littered with examples that, according to lots of Christian scholars, the lure of political power for the Church has resulted in grave and unfortunate tragedies throughout history. The more political power the church has had historically, the worse it’s fared. This is a generalization, but one that’s pretty accurate.

• Christ fought evil, but he fought it in a strange sort of way. Instead of calling down, as Chris said, legions of angels, he submitted Himself to death. He substituted his life in order to beat evil.

• Christ was faced with a temptation in the desert of political power. He turned it down. In one movie, it was featured as a child starving, and Christ could have grabbed the reigns of all the nations of the world to stop this child from starving. But he didn’t.

Ginghamsburg Church
So all these ideas are floating around in my head. And then I went to church this Sunday. I went to a church in Dayton called Ginghamsburg church this past weekend with my best friend from high school Eric and his wife Amanda. The church recently was rated at the 9th most influential congregation in America. Obviously, number 1 and 2 were Saddleback and Willowcreek, but coming in number 9 (number 8 was The Potter’s House run by T.D. Jakes and number 10 was Ted Haggard’s church in Colorado Springs). I found out why the church was picked: its pastor, Mike Slaughter, is just awesome.

Last Christmas, he encouraged his congregation to no reinforce the selfishness of the holiday. He told them to match what they were going to give for presents to a fund to feed African children in Sudan. Or, to half what they were going to spend on Christmas presents and give the other half to Africa. The church raised 1.8 million dollars with the Christmas for Sudan drive.

As a result, the church will build two schools, a medical building, and has bought some cropland and has planted and irrigated a section of land that will result in enough food for 2000 people. Slaughter is going over to Sudan this August.

He was told before he went that he has to get his theology of evil down because in Sudan, there isn’t anyone to protect you. The people with M16s, aren’t good. The cops are all corrupt. The government doesn’t want you there. In fact, last week, Slaughter got a letter from the US Embassy telling him that the US strongly discourages all travel to Sudan because of hostile conditions.

“It’s great to be 53 years old and having to depend on God for my life,” Slaughter said yesterday, before the congregation came down and prayed for the 4-person team.

Slaughter’s message was on evil. And how evil always attacks innocence. He then quoted Revelation.

What’s the Deal with Revelation

Now, recently, as I’ve been reading online and reading lots of books, I finally figured out a minor mystery. Over Memorial Day, my father-in-law said to me, “How come Evangelicals use certan books of the Bible so much more than others.”

I had no idea what he was talking about.

“You know, like Revelation,” he said.

To be honest, I didn’t know. I side-stepped the question, saying that evangelicals often concentrated on Genesis and the Gospels because it’s origins and it’s the life of Christ. But I’d never heard anyone preach from Revelation.

But then I started reading all these articles, and I saw how certain segments of Evangelicals use Revelation every other word. I finally figured out that I think it’s because of the image of Christ coming back as victorious. This world is tough, and Christ usually loses when it comes to decisions and morality and the choices that people make. So it’s nice and comforting to know that someday, evil will lose.

But I think it goes beyond that. I think Revelation is used by those churches and those leaders strategically. I think they’re saying, “it’s time for Christians to win. It’s time for Christians to take back what is theirs. This is a holy war, people, and the life of our nation is at stake. So let’s roll!”

Whoop whoop. Crowd cheers.

Christ as victor. Don’t mess with Christ, or you’ll get the blunt end of a sword of fire, because he is the victor and you’re wrong and we’re right, and that’s ultimate reality.

Slaughter then pulled up a quote from Revelation, and I thought to myself, What is it about Revelation?”

But then Slaughter pulled the quote out and went through it.

7And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. 8But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. 9The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.

10Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:
"Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God,
and the authority of his Christ.
For the accuser of our brothers,
who accuses them before our God day and night,
has been hurled down.
11They overcame him
by the blood of the Lamb
and by the word of their testimony;
they did not love their lives so much
as to shrink from death.

The key thing here is that Jesus is known as many names in the Bible. But the one the conquers evil once and for all is not the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. But the lamb.

Slaughter’s point, which I have been rolling around in my head, were this:

1. Evil always attacks innocence.
2. Evil uses power and control as its primary weapons.
3. Evil can never be defeated by power and control, but only by vulnerability and innocence.
4. We are called to step in between innocence and evil.
5. This will always mean losing our life, either metaphorically or literally.

This is why the political movements by Ghandi and MLK had such power and effectiveness. They stepped in between evil and innocence. It was the marchers who were bludgeoned with clubs, hit by police, bombarded with tear gas and attacked with dogs. It was the peaceful peasants who were gunned down by General Dwyer in the Massacre of Amritsar.

Stepping in between evil and taking what was never meant for you so that those who the blows were meant for never have to feel them. Isn’t that what sacrifice is about, especially Jesus’? Slaughter said, "If these people in Sudan gun us down, we will go and build more hospitals for them. If they kill us, we will go and build more schools."

The point isn’t about political movements: it’s about what YOU are doing to step in front of evil. What are you doing to personally step in front of evil?

I have a friend who is raising his sister’s eldest daughter because she can’t. When he found his niece, she was almost suicidal and had given up on life and herself. Now, she’s one of the more amazing young women I know, getting straight As, and as helpful and kind of a young person as I know. He’s provided her with a family. My buddy stepped in front of evil.

I have another friend who works tirelessly to send blankets and supplies down to a little orphanage in Mexico, where he adopted a little girl who he supports every month. In January, he’s leading a group of 10 people down to this orphanage to help for a week and deliver supplies. He’s stepping in front of evil.

I have another married couple who I am friends with. They just got back from Ghana on a medical missions trip. Their hearts are so on fire for this region, they’re going to try to raise $10,000 dollars so that the people there can have a well with clean water. It’s a simple procedure: just jam a pipe 50 feet into the spring and cap off the top. They’re trying to raise money. They’re stepping in front of evil.

I have another friend who’s girlfriend’s parents hate him because he’s not the “right” race. He’s been patient, and attempted to build bridges with the parents of this girl that he loves. It’s going nowhere, but he refuses to back down, refuses to stop praying, refuses to stop trying being open to them, if they ever come around. He’s absorbed all that hate, and not let one spark out. He’s stepping in front of evil.

I have another friend whose family is poor, and he’s constantly sending money and trying to help out with mortgage payments. He is concerned with their physical well-being and he gives up his money to help them out, even though he’d probably much rather spend that money to fix up his new house or go on a more elaborate vacation with his new wife. He is stepping in front of evil.

I think this is the message of Christ. And I think that truth, that power, that personal volition to stand up, is what the current Evangelical church needs to hear more of.

Because right now, they're just good people who are good for nothing.

I don't want to be that kind of follower of Christ.

Best Picture of the Year

Since I'm on vacation, I'm doing something I don't get a lot of chance to do: namely read a ton, spend time with my son, and watch movies.

I saw a good one the other day. I saw Batman Begins. Lot of good stuff going on in that movie. I enjoyed it, but I'm probably the most biased person in the world, since I collected Batman comic books for years as a boy. Something about an orphaned boy wanting to be something important has always stirred me in ways that no other hero could.

But then I saw a movie that reminded me about what movies are for. I'm not the only one who thought so, apparently. The Academy Awards gave it "Best Picture" last year. It's called Million Dollar Baby.

It's undeniably brilliant. People who know tell me the cinematography is simply shocking. But where the movie really shines in from a screenplay-writing perspective. Paul Haggis did an astounding job. Consider the scene where Clint Eastwood tells Morgan Freeman that he has holes in his socks. The scene plays out for two minutes, and is the kind of thing that's just a joy to watch and listen to. It has the feel of a conversation between friends who have been talking for decades to each other. It's just brilliant. Lesser minds would have cut it: Eastwood leaves it in. Because it's important to the characters. This isn't a boxing movie: it's a movie about people who happen to be boxers.

The movie - like all art - is designed to be discussed and felt.

If you've seen it, I'd like to hear what you thought about it. If you haven't: don't chime in, and don't read the comments because I don't want to give anything away.

This is a movie that deserves to be seen.

Simon Le Bon in Dayton; Q-bert Coming Next Week

Duran Duran is playing tonight at the Fraze Pavilion - a 3000 seat ampitheatre - in Kettering. It made front-page news on the Entertainment Section of today's Dayton Daily News.

Duran Duran.

My wife saw the story and said, "I used to have a poster of them in my bedroom."

I used to have a poster of Bo Jackson, too. But that doesn't mean he's section-front news.

Being back in my boyhood home makes one nostalgic. But Duran Duran? I mean, what decade are we in? Of course, in 1982, Princess Diana did declare that the British pop team was her favorite band. And how can you argue with hit songs like, "Hungry Like a Wolf" and "Rio" and "Girls on Film" and most importantly "The Reflex."

It made me think back to my days at 3524 Stutsman Road. And some of the most important trends of that decade: the 80s.

Pac-Man
This incredibly simple game caused millions to lose their quarters in 1980-81. The game comes from a Japanese word "pakupaku" which means to repeatedly open and close one's mouth. THe game was first called "Puckman" but for once, a video game company foresaw problems ahead and changed the name to the family friendly - and vandal resistant - name that lives on today. At one point in time, I actually watched, with relish, an animated cartoon featuring the adventures of Pac-man. In today's world of super-realistic video games, I have no idea how I'm going to explain this one to my son.

We had this yellow circle that went around and ate fruit and ghosts....no, wait, son, come back! I haven't told you about the angry monkey that throws barrels or the frog that tries to cross the road!"

The Oprah Winfrey Show
A local northern Illinois program called A.M. Chicago changed it's name to the Oprah Winfrey Show, hitting national ariwaves on Sept. 8, 1986. She hasn't left since. Want to know how powerful this woman is? i can speak first-hand. I came homet o find not one, but two books by William Faulkner in the coffee table. Now, my mom is a retired kindergarten teacher. I can understand her reading "Tuesdays with Morrie" but "The Sound and the Fury?" Are you kidding me? But because Oprah suggested it, my mother is reading William Faulkner and following along on internet online discussions with English professors. It's like, "Are you kidding me?"

CNN
The network was founded on June 1, 1980 by Ted Turner and Reese Schonfeld, who turned a vision of 24-hour news network into a reality most Americans can't imagine living without. Hard to believe that for a while, CNN was the laughingstock of news media. Now, it's the standard.

California vs. Greenwood
What's this, you might ask? Just a little tidbit of info I picked up from my Constitutional Law class. Though not the most important Supreme Court case of the 80s (that's probably Texas. v. Johnson), it is probably the most interesting. This is the case in which 9 dignified justices decided once and for all that curbside garbage is fair game. In other words, police can pick through your garbage in order to get enough dirt (get it?) to warrant an official search (get it?) inside. The vote was 6-2, with the dissenters claiming that picking through garbage is not civilized behavior; the majority said that trash bags on the street are open to inspection by "animals, children, scavengers, snoops and other members of the public." Interestingly enough, after this May 1988 decision, a new industry was formed. Paper shredders. Seriously. Look it up.

USA for Africa
The song We Are The World flew off the shelves in March of 1985 so fast that it was estimated that for the first time, more singles were sold than US households. Which means, that statistically speaking, there was more than one copy of this song - produced and written by Quincy Jones, Michael Jackson and Lionel Richie - per house. I know for a fact that the Tieche household had three. I bought one, and each of my parents gave it to me for an Easter present. Proceeds went to help famine-starved Ethiopia.

This is going to sound cheesy, but this song actually changed my life. I had an English teacher in 10th grade play the song after we read the book "The Grapes of Wrath" by Steinbeck, which was largely about the indifference of the world to the suffering of those in need physically. This song attempted to shock us out of apathy by appealing to a message that Christ himself would be proud of.

There comes a time when we heed a certain call
When the world, must come together as one
Wwe can't go on pretending day by day
That someone somewhere will soon make a change
There are people dying
And it's time to lend a hand
To life. The greatest gift of all
We are the world
We are the children
We are the ones who make a brighter day
So let's start giving

Even more moving, you had this blend of artists, some with gorgeous voices (Lionel Richie, Steve Ingram) and others with terrible, but beautifully distinct voices (Bob Dylan, Cyndi Lauper, Willie Nelson). Nowhere was this better articulated than at the end when Bruce Springsteen and Stevie Wonder duet back and forth. The smoothness of Stevie, the rough, textures of Bruce. It's harmony among discord. It's rough next to smooth. It's black next to white. It's blue collar versus I can't tell what color your collar is. It's moving, that's what it is.

The message: we all are part of this thing. We all can help. Even if you can barely sing, you can be part of something beautiful. Call me silly, but to me, that's a large part of the message of Christ. We all are in the body.

Except the third Pointer Sister. She was nowhere to be found.

Good Article

A good article worth reading from religion reporter Chris Hedges, a reporter from the New York Times who has won numerous awards for his war-time journalism.

He reports about the convention for the National Religious Broadcasters Association.

You can read it here.

Christianity Today called it "paranoid."

I'm interested to hear your reactions: good, bad and ugly.

If you don't have time, you can read thisgreat editorial from the editors of Christianity today here.

Vacationing in the Buckeye State

So I’m back home in Ohio.

I find it interesting psychologically to see that I refer to it as home, even though I haven’t lived in Ohio in the last 4 years, and have only lived there 2 of the last 11 years. But still, it’s where I grew up. And I lived there 18 years of my life, which means San Jose won’t eclipse Beavercreek as the place I’ve lived the longest until 2019.

It’s shockingly green out here. Just green everywhere. The corn is almost ready, and the golden tassels are taller than me, in neat green rows that float on as far as you can see. My parent’s house sits on 5.4 acres, which isn’t that much land, until you realize that Oakridge Mall isn’t even on 5 acres of land.

I like coming back home. It’s quiet out here. Nicole and I drove to Hollywood Video along the back, country winding roads surrounded by forests and green trees and acres of manicured grass. This afternoon, I sat on the porch swing with Justus during a summer thunderstorm, watching the rain pour down and the wind whip the branches around. Justus was mesmerized. So was I, in a different kind of way. There’s something profoundly calming about storms in the Midwest. It calms me. I can’t really explain why.

There isn’t much to do around here, but we don’t care. I’m looking to not do a whole lot because this is the last vacation I’ll have until Thanksgiving. My parents are loving playing with Justus, and I have a feeling that leaving next Tuesday is going to be harder than any time I’ve ever left home before. Especially for my mom.

But it’s going well. Dad used his smoker to smoke some chicken breasts with apple wood branches. It was probably the best chicken I’ve ever had, besides the time the Zimans spent most of a day making beer can chicken. Mom made homemade peach cobbler. And sweet corn will be filling up Farmer’s Markets any day now, along with deep-red tomatoes that taste best cut into slices with a little salt, pepper and olive oil.

It’s good to be home. I plan on reading a whole bunch and just resting. And this is the perfect place for it.

Like my best friend Jon once said, "Ohio is a fine place to be from."

Christopher Walken: He Could Order Pizza and It'd Be Hilarious

Okay, this is just plain funny.

If you haven't seen this video by Fatboy Slim called Weapon of Choice check it out. I have loved Christopher Walken ever since I saw him in "Pulp Fiction." The deadpan way he delivered his lines was a form of comic genius I'd never seen. I was unaware that he was also a classically trained dancer.

The video is hilarious - and it features gorgeous camera-work.

Download
Download the full video here - but it's 48 MB.

Streaming
Or, see it with less clarity in streaming video here.

Sometimes, what I think is funny isn't to a lot of people. As my close friend Jon would say, "This is where, in the Venn Diagram of sense of humor, Dave and I don't overlap." I'm interested to see what everyone else thinks.

So a funny thing happened on the way through the trailer park...

So my wife and I live in a really nice house, and I love where I live, but the other day I was giving my buddy directions to my house and I said these words:

"Get off 101. You'll see a Wal-mart. Turn left. Our house is right across from the trailer home park."

Not the kind of thing that results in massive gentrification, usually. But San Jose is a strange bird, and even homes located next to 50-year-old rusted out pieces of junk are worth most of the way toward a million dollars these days.

So last evening, my wife and I took Justus through the trailer park on a walk. The walk turned out to be very revealing, for a number of reasons. First off, I learned that the park is called "Magical Sands." Strangely, I located nothing even remotely "sandy" about the place.

I also learned during the walk that my mother-in-law actually called up to see how much it would cost for her to move the mobile home she just bought for her youngest daughter in Michigan out to California, so that she could retire near her daughter and Justus.

The number of things that frighten me about that last sentence are almost too many to count.

But anyway...the good news is it's too much. They don't allow transfers, and there's no open spots. Plus, mobile homes in Michigan cost 10K for a double-wide. Here, they're more like 70-90K. The reason I know this is because my wife, unbeknownest to me, actually went to the sales office of Magical Sands to find this information out for her mother. I think she was curious, too. How much does it cost to buy a mobile home in San Jose? How much does the land cost?

Anyway, to make a long story short, my wife was telling me that the woman in charge of sales for Magical Sands gave her a business card. But underneath the woman's name, something had been blackened out with a black permanent marker. Sometimes, people do this with old, defunct telephone numbers. But Nicole noticed that it wasn't a telephone number: it was the motto, written in italics, under the name "Magical Sands."

Want to know what it said? The old motto, currently blacked out by marker was

Magical Sands
The Baghdad of Mobile Home Parks

Okay, when were these cards made? And when, and under what circumstances was that motto considered a good one? Isn't that like saying: Ben And Jerry's - The West Nile Virus of Ice Cream Stores.

Sheesh.

A Couple of Ends Come Together; Also Tieche Sermons Now Available Online

So I tried something the other day. I wrote a sermon around a song.

The song is called "Held" and it's by Natalie Grant. It was written by a woman named Christa Evans who, in the span of two months, saw her two best friends go through unspeakable tragedy. One, who had gone through 3 miscarriages, finally gave birth to a healthy baby boy. One morning, she and her husband woke up to find the baby died of SIDS. Crib death, it's called. Two months later, her other best friend's husband went into the doctor's office because of headaches. He was diagnosed with brain cancer and died in just a few months.

How do you process that? The song is one of the best I've heard in the last 6 months. Check it out.

It just so happened, by sheer coincidence that I began studying a passage in the Bible where John the Baptist asks Jesus if he is going to be released from prison and certain death, or if he's going to die. Jesus responds, cryptically, that John will not get out of prison.

I tied the two together, throwing in a clip from the movie "Signs" where Mel Gibson's character Graham Hess - who lost his wife in a traffic accident - tells his family that he is not wasting one more minute of his life on prayer, because clearly God does not hear or care or answer.

We're also trying to podcast the whole message for folks. I'd like to thank my brilliant IT guy, Steve "Duct Tape" Ferrero, who at 19, is one of the sharpest guys I've ever met in my life. If you'd like, you can download the message here.

John the Baptist Got Beheaded: Sometimes God Doesn't Show Up Like You'd Think

Growing up, one of my favorite books was Robin Hood. I think every young boy loves Robin Hood. The idea of this wily, crafty bandit with exceptional powers of archery outsmarting his foes in order to redistribute immorally seized resources from corrupt local governments strikes at the heart of every blooming economist...er...boy.

My favorite story in those tales was when Robin’s third in command, Will Scarlet, is captured by the villainous Sheriff of Nottigham. Knowing that killing Scarlet would demoralize Robin Hood’s band, the Sheriff plans to hang the man for treason. But the Sheriff also feels as though killing Scarlet publicly could draw Robin Hood out into the open, so he sets a trap for him, just in case he tries something.

Of course, because he’s Robin Hood, he has to go attempt to save Will Scarlet’s life. The men dress up like friars, in brown robes and mill about inconspicuously among the crowd. But they can’t move too soon, or their cover will be blown.

Scarlet is led to the gallows. His young face feverishly scans across the massive crowd for signs of hope – signs of familiar faces, a signal that help has come and will rescue him.

But he sees no such sign. Terror overwhelms him as he is pushed off the platform. The rope around his neck grows taut and Scarlet knows that no help is coming to save him. His close calls have finally caught up with him.

At that moment, Robin Hood blows his horn. The men spring into action. Robin Hood draws his longbow and lets fly a single arrow. It soars through the air, lancing the rope holding Will Scarlet’s flailing body. Scarlet drops to down, right into the arms of Little John, who is in a wagon, galloping past the gallows.

The guards attempt to stop the Band the Thieves but it is no use. Once again, they have been outsmarted.

This scene resonates with me for a number of reasons. First off, it speaks to the heroism and dedication that all young men dream of in their friends. We all long to belong to a devoted band of friends willing to all risk their life for you, if it came to that.

But secondly, it reminds us that in the end, Good wins. Even when it looks like Evil is going to win, Good will come through with a daring, last minute rescue.

HOW THIS RELATES TO THE BIBLE

So, how does this relate to the Bible? Well, I am in the process of reading through the New Testament using a Bible companion called the “Jewish New Testament” written by Rabbi David Stern (not the NBA Commissioner, but a devout Jew who came to accept that Christ really was the Messiah after studying the life of Jesus).

So, right now, I am in Matthew 11. I didn’t say I was very far.

Anyway, reading through that, I came across this passage, which has always perplexed me a bit.

Matthew 11
Jesus and John the Baptist
1After Jesus had finished instructing his twelve disciples, he went on from there to teach and preach in the towns of Galilee. 2When John heard in prison what Christ was doing, he sent his disciples 3to ask him, "Are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else?"

Now, this verse makes me go wha-what for a number of reasons. First off, there’s no way that John the Baptist really needs to know the answer to this question. He was there when Jesus was baptized and a loud voice said, from the sky, “This is my son, with whom I am well pleased.”

If that’s not a sign, I don’t know what is.

Also, it says that John knew Jesus in utero. In Luke 1, it says:

39A few days later Mary hurried to the hill country of Judea, to the town 40where Zechariah lived. She entered the house and greeted Elizabeth. 41At the sound of Mary's greeting, Elizabeth's child leaped within her, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit.

So clearly, John doesn’t need any additional information that Jesus is the Messiah. So what is going on here?

Stern says it’s code. According to all the old Rabbis who had combed the Scriptures, there were 7 Key Things that the Messiah was definitely going to do. These things were all taught because the Rabbis wanted to make sure good Jewish boys and girls could grow up to recognize the Messiah when He came. Those seven things were.

1. Make the blind see (Isaiah 35:5, 29:18)
2. Make the lame walk (Isaiah 35:6, 61:1)
3. Make the deaf hear (Isaiah 35:5, 29:18)
4. Raise the dead/Heaven with Life (Isaiah 11)
5. Help the poor (Isaiah 61:1)
6. Heal the infirm/sick (Isaiah 61:1)
7. Free the captives (Isaiah 61:1)

Notice the last one. Free the captives.

John was asking, in code, “Are you going to rescue me, because it’s not looking too good and I even hear they might think about killing me if they get the chance.”

He was saying, “If I go to the hangman’s noose, can I count on you to save me?”

What’s amazing to me is the response of Jesus. Look what He says.

4Jesus replied, "Go back and report to John what you hear and see: 5The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor. 6Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of me."

Jesus goes though every single one of the signs of the Messiah. But He leaves one out. He leaves out the Free the Captives. In code, Jesus responds to the question of John the Baptist by saying, “No. No, you won’t be rescued.”

Sometimes, God doesn't save us in the way that we expect. Sometimes, God doesn't show up in the way that we would have planned. Sometimes, cancer wins. Sometimes, AIDS wins. Sometimes, she leaves and there's nothing you can do about it.

But Jesus goes on to say that among those born of man, John the Baptist is the greatest. But that even the least in the Kingdom of Heaven are greater than he was. Why? John the Baptist was the greatest because he came at the end of a long line of prophets, but he alone got to actually see and speak with God incarnate.

But John didn't have something that all of us have: the knowledge of the end of the story.

John didn't know that God would lay down his life for all of us.

John didn't know that Jesus would conquer the one obstacle that no man had ever been able to defeat: death.

John didn't know that in the end, love wins.

But we do.

And that should give us hope.

I Love San Jose...

Yesterday for lunch, Jon suggested that we go this great little Korean restuarant he found. Jon, as you know, is really into Korean things these days.

Ba-dum.

(for those of you not following the joke, Jon is dating an amazing young woman named Gina who is Korean).

Anyhoo.

I ask Jon, "So where is this Korean Restaurant.'

"Japantown" he replies.

Only in San Jose.

Billy Graham, Bill Clinton and Hitler: Social Religious Conservatives Apparently Hate All Three

There's a new movie called "The Downfall" that chronicles the last days of Hitler. I haven't seen it, but my buddy showed it in his AP government courses, and it really messed up my kids. The film shows Hitler's last days, starting from the eve of his 56th birthday to the day he committed suicide with Eva Braun, who he had married a few hours earlier.

But most disorienting to the kids was that the film showed Hitler being cordial and kind to his employees and co-workers, petting a dog. In general, it showed a human side to Adolf Hitler.

Critics and sociologist wonder at the wisdom of showing this, fearing (especially because the movie is made by Germans) that it will soften feelings for the man whose "Final Solution" caused as much human suffering as anyone who's ever lived on earth.

The tension is this: Hitler is a mass murdering psycopath who was insane. No doubt. And in the broader historical context the dude tore apart millions of lives. But he was also a person. And to make him out to be some sort of monster and to demonize him lets us off the hook. We say to ourselves, "Hilter was different. He was a monster. I'm not a monster."

I'm not sure if that's theologically accurate.

I'm not sure but perhaps anytime you demonize a person and make them out to be wholly evil, devoid of any good, maybe you're off base.

I certainly think this is the case with most conservatives and Bill Clinton. I've heard Conservatives react to Bill Clinton the way potassium reacts to water. It's like instant, fiery reaction. It's an anger I can't understand.

For example, I was perusing Christianity Today's site and I came across a series of articles where Conservative Pastors across the country were condemning Billy Graham.

Billy Graham!

Why? Because at his Crusade in New York, he had the former president and his wife on stage with him, and he said some kind things about the former president.

In this scathing editorial, Rev. Rob Schenck, the president of the National Clergy Council tells Why I Walked Out on Billy Graham.

::Thought of the Day::
When you start criticizing Billy Graham, maybe you should check yourself.

I just have to keep remembering that Jesus got flack for seeing value in people the Pharisees wanted torched.

Betcha Ed Bundy Doesn't Fly Coach

So on the plane to Phoenix, flying back from Denver, my wife and I were in the second to last row in the plane. Which was actually quite fine because there was an extra seat between us, so Justus could sleep.

But anyway, in the row across the aisle was this young, somewhat familiar looking guy in a camouflage shirt, sunglasses and a ball cap. He was travelling with a pretty young girl, but that is not why I noticed him. I noticed him because my wife leaned in to me and said:

"Doesn't that guy kind of look like the guy from Married with Children? The brother? Bud."

So I looked over. And the guy kind of did. A lot. So we started whispering, and wondering. Then he got on his cell phone, and started talking to someone. We pretended not to be eavesdropping, but we were. He turned to the woman.

I got offered a part, I heard him say. He went back to the phone.

As long as the part isn't cheesy, I heard the young man say. Which struck me as weird because if this was indeed Bud, from Married with Children, it seems to me that you take what you can. You know what they say about beggars, after all.

So I'm pretty sure I flew on ATA from Denver to Phoenix with Bud Bundy, otherwise known as David Faustino. You might scoff, but this is no small potatoes. Among his accomplishments:

• He played a starring role in the longest-running live-action sitcom in television history. Married...with Children was on FOX for 11 years, beating perennial favorite Cheers on NBC. More importantly, he spent 11 years - many of them early puberty - in shockingly close proximity to Christina Applegate.

• He was also the voice of Cavin in television's The Gummy Bears. So magic and mystery are part of his history. Along with the secret of gummy berry juice.

• He's also listed as playing the role of Carl in a new movie called The Trouble With Frank starring Jon Bon Jovi, easily a C-list player in Hollywood. Did I mention that Nora Dunn has also signed on to that project? Well, she has.

The craziest part of it all was that he was really nice and cordial. The girl with him, who had a rock on her finger, so I can only assume that he's engaged, was really interested in Justus. Which was really kind of nice. So I have a new appreciation for Bud.

Just goes to show: sometimes, the TV lies.

Netflix vs. Blockbuster Online vs. Branham Video

So, as you know, there are a myriad of deals out there for mail-in DVD rental companies.

The idea is: choose your video, they send it to you, you send it back.

So my question is if anybody out there is currently a subscriber to Blockbuster Online or Netflix. Is one better than the other? There rates and conditions are identical, it seems. Is this a good move?

Here's my situation.

1. I already rent, probably 2-3 movies a month, each one tending to be $3.00.

2. I have a tendency to return them late, which is annoying to me. And really annoying to my wife.

3. I don't want to start watching more movies than I already do.

4. There's this Kiosk thing in Safeway that rents DVDs (like an ATM) where I have rented DVDs for $1.50. That's pretty cheap. But you have to return them within 24 hours. And their selection is very limited: mainly only the newest releases. And sometimes they're out of the popular ones.

Anybody out there with experience want to chime in. I'm seeking the counsel of the saints on this one.

Happy Aniversary to Me...

My wonderful wife Traci Nicole and I celebrated the two-year anniversary of when we got married, which was, as I just said, two years ago.

We talked and she agreed to stick with me for another year. So we're going for three in a row.

Hey, not much in comparison to some couples, but we statistically have trumped 78 percent of all Hollywood nuptuals.

If you see my wife, congratulate her for putting up with me as her husband for 730 consecutive days.

DAT

Second Thought: Maybe Denver Isn't So Nice...

So ever have something happen that suddenly makes you appreciate something you didn't appreciate before? Like, your friend leaves for a year-long mission trip and you realize how much you miss them. Or, you give up chocolate for Lent and you realize just how yummilicious the liqueur from that sweet cacao bean is.

So yesterday, on the Fourth of July, we were invited over to Scot's neighbor's house for a barbecue. I was impressed because
a: these people had never met us and were giving us grilled filet mignon and
b: these people were grilling filet mignon.

It is on rare times such as this that although I love and support my wife's decision to be vegetarian, I think she's plain nuts. Meat is good.

Anyway, my friend Kari was starting conversation and mentioned they were moving from California to the Chicago area. The person she was talking to - a guest of this family - had a weird reaction. She was like, "Well of course you wanted to get out of there. I mean, sheesh. It's California."

Kari got indignant. And so did I.

So I take back all those nice things I said about how if I had to move, I'd move to Denver.

You pick on California, you pick on me.

Happy Fourth of July

Well, first off, Happy Fourth of July. Today, we celebrate our nation's freedom by barbecueing, a symbolic act where tyranny is represented by steaks - or perhaps hot dogs - that get roasted over the searing flames of justice, made hot by the lighter fluid of national sovereignty and finally washed down with cold beer of freedom.

I am writing this from my buddy Scot's house. He lives just outside of Denver, and our family is visiting him for the holiday weekend. Acually, we're in the middle of moving our friends across country to Chicago, and this is the midway point.

Denver is really kind of a perfect city. I was surprised how much I like it here. If I had to move, I think I'd move to Denver. It's climate's far more temperate than you'd think: they hardly get any snow. There's little humidity, and right now, it's about 78 with a soft breeze from the mountains.



Nature:
Tie. The Rockies are gorgeous, but it's hard to beat the Redwoods of the Santa Cruz mountains. Great skiing in CO, but Tahoe is pretty world famous too. And Tahoe is just as rad in the summer. Colorado has thunderstorms, which the Bay Area doesn't, but the Bay Area has the ocean, which Colorado doesn't.

Sports teams:
The Bay Area has two baseball teams and two football teams, whereas Denver only has one. Both have a sucky basketball team, and each have one NHL team. But the way the Niners and the Raiders have been playing...

Housing Market:
Denver - Scot's 2200 sq. foot house on a half acre cost $250,000. I suppose you could say, however, that San Jose's massive growth is actually better, but if you're looking for a big, afforable house with lots of room for the fam, the Bay Area isn't the place to be.

Climate:
Tie - Denver's more temperate in the summer, rarely topping 85, but has lower winter temperatures. I was surprised to learn that snow is actually rare in Denver, and when it does snow, it melts by the afternoon. Scot bought a snow shovel and has yet to use it.

Cost of Living:
Denver. Much cheaper here. Gas is 2.10.

Demographics:
Bay Area. Although I was surprised to learn that Denver is a primary immigration point, you can't top the Bay Area in terms of diversity of languages and nationalities. Denver is pretty WASP-y.

Anybody else have a place they've been that should make the short list of great places to live?