Cheerios, Chicago, Churches and One of the Best Sermons I've Ever Heard (sorry, ran out of "c" words)

Okay, so four quick things.

I woke up this morning and went to the top of the fridge, where we conveniently keep all our boxes of cereal. Now, my wife buys the cereal, and usually there is a modicum of selection. Total, for the days when I want my grains whole. Shredded Wheat, on the day where I feel like I want my grains shredded. Sometimes, even a heathy granola with raisins. Today, here was my selection

• Berry Blast Cheerios
• Yogurt Burst Cheerios
• Honey Nut Cheerios
• Cheerios

That's it. Cheerios. "Justus like them," my wife said.

*sigh*

Barney is not far away, people. Not far away.

ITEM TWO: The Zimans
So Nicole and I are flying out to Chicago this weekend to visit our dear friends the Zimans. Not since post-college have I been so intent on making a long-distance relationship work. Nicole and I are already packed. Not that we're that excited.

ITEM THREE: The New Building
YEsterday, after our third and final Sunday service, folks stuck around and helped FCC move everything out of it's current facility at 20 Great Oaks Blvd to the new building at 478 Piercy Rd. We had slated Sunday-Wednesday, in hope that we'd get enough volunteers to move every single thing out fo the building and still have time to clean by Wednesday night, which is the 1st of the month. We figured four days, with a big enough volunteer force, would probably get the job done, if we coordinated everything right. So we started yesterday at 2 p.m.

By 6 p.m. the 20 Great Oaks building was empty and cleaned.

By 8 p.m., we were sending masses of volunteers home because there wasn't anything left for them to do.

I will blog more about this later, but the whole experience was unbelievably spiritual and shocking. I don't know if I've ever seen that much work get done that quickly. If you go to FCC and you didn't get a chance to help out yesterday, man, you missed out not on hard labor, but on a living example of the power of community. I can't wait until Wednesday, when we have another volunteer day to get things finalized on the campus for our first service. It's going to be even better.

Item Four: Maybe The Best Sermon I've Ever Heard
To say that something is the "Best Sermon" you've ever heard is an entirely subjective judgment. Oh, sure, there are elements of rhetoric and style that preachers use. And then there's things like humor, insight and stick-in-your-head-one-liners. But when you say that something is the "Best Sermon" you've ever heard, it usually means that God used it to impact your life and shift it in a real and powerful way.

So in that way, it's kind of like saying, "This is the best movie I've ever seen." Sometimes, you try to share your favorite movie and people are like, "What? That's your faviorite movie?" I did that with the movie "MIllions," which made me really cry hard, and everyone else is like, "Uhh...the movie was okaaaay."

It's just the way it hit me, I guess. So, with that in mind "The Best Sermon I've Ever Heard" up until this point, has been a three-way tie between a sermon I heard T.D. Jakes give at a Willowcreek Leadership Summit (which made me realize I have a place in God's church), a sermon I heard John Ortberg give during the OTC about Job (which made me want to preach the Bible so beautifully at some point in my life) and a sermon by Scotty Smith in Steven Curtis Chapman's church in Nashville (which made me realize that if I was to call myself a Christian, I had best get up and serve somebody).

I have a new contender. Maybe not top 3, but definately top 5. As I link to it, and if you choose to download and listen to his podcast, realize this is entirely subjective and has everything to do with where I was spiritually in my life, and the things that God was speaking to my heart. But this is the most spiritually impactful sermon I've listened to in a long time. Paradigm shifting.

Erwin McManus: Prayer - Spiritual Activism

p.s. And if you don't like it, please don't email me. It deflates me. Just like when people don't like "Millions."

Poetry, Everyday

So as a high school English teacher, I'm starting a new unit on poetry for my juniors. One of the roles, as I see it, of a poetry teacher in high school is to act as a talent scout for poems. Not every poem is going to work if you try to teach it to 17-year-olds. For example, nearly every poem in the 32-copies of the Literary Anthology that is sitting in my classroom. I am not going to teach "Thanatopsis" by William Cullen Bryant or "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" by T.S. Eliot. So I've been pouring through anthologies and collections, trying to collect like about 200 poems that I think are worth reading and teaching. I'm up to about 42.

So, when I find them, I'm going to put them up for you folks to read. Since I'm sure, like vitamins, you're not getting your recommended daily allowance of poetry either.

So here goes. This first one goes out to my dad, and Dads everywhere.

Sign for my father, who stressed the bunt
David Bottoms (b. 1949)

On the rough diamond,
the hand-cut field beneath the dog lot and the barn,
we rehearsed the strict technique
of bunting. I watched from the infield,
the mound, the backstop
as your left hand climbed the bat, your legs
and shoulders squared toward the pitcher.
You could drop it like a seed
down either base line. I admired your style,
but not enough to take my eyes off the bank
that served as our center-field fence.

Years passed, three leagues of organized ball,
no few lives. I could homer
into the garden beyond the bank,
into the left-field lot of Carmichael Motors,
and still you stressed the same technique,
the crouch and spring, the lead arm absorbing
just enough impact. That whole tiresome pitch
about basics never changing,
and I never learned what you were laying down.

Like the hand brushed across the bill of a cap,
let this be the sign
I'm getting a grip on the sacrifice.

Brokeback Mountain sparks moral outrage...maybe too much moral outrage

Actual conversation overheard today in the halls of my school. Pardon the vulgarity. I work in a high school.

BOY 1: You heard about that movie Brokeback Mountain?
BOY 2: That movie about the queer cowboys?
BOY 1: Yeah.
BOY 2: Yeah.
BOY 1: You seen it?
BOY 2: Hell no. That *poop* is *messed* up.
BOY 1: You seen "Hostel?"
BOY 2: (Excitedly) Yeah.
BOY 1: Yeah.
BOY 2: That *poop* was tight, man.

I write all this because when the film "Brokeback Mountain" - which won the Golden Globe for Best Movie - comes up in conversation, I have heard several Christians barely able to mask their revulsion. Not like, 3 or 4, but like 20. We're talking outright disgust in their voices.

Now, I can kind of understand. I don't particularly want to pay to go see a movie that has some - as I understand it - fairly graphic homosexual sex scenes. I'm against seeing graphic sex scenes in general, regardless of the gender of the people.

Which brings me to my point. Why so much moral outrage over this movie? Why not the same disgust for, say, "The Bridges of Madison County" which is about adultery, an action which is, by the way, breaking a very specific commandment. Or why not as much outrage about the movie "Hostel" which is about a hostel in Europe where willing, paying folks go to kill and torture people for sport. The movie depicts people getting dismembered and tortured in wicked, disgusting, visually explicit ways. Many have said that Quentin Tarantino's movie is about as vulgar and violent as a movie can get. Killing innocent people is also very much against the heart of God (there's a commandment there on that one, too). But no barely-able-to-contain-my-outrage from Christians on that one, either. But get two confused comboys trying to figure out life and their own sexuality, and man, I'll frown you down from 3,000 yards.

To be fair, maybe folks are over-compensating reacting because of the hype the movie is receiving. But I'm willing to bet that the reason the movie is getting hype is not because of the "Gay Conspiracy Theory" - you know that theory that folks have that gay people have "an agenda" they're trying to "force" on the American people, mainly though Will & Grace and men's figure skating. But I'm willing to bet the reason the movie is going to get Oscar nods is not because of GLADD, but probably because the Oscar-award-winning director, Ang Lee (Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon) and the screenplay writer (famed "Lonesome Dove" author Larry McMurty) have actually produced a real piece of art.

Let me state this unequivocably - there are a lot more dangerous movies out there than "Brokeback Mountain." "Get Rich or Die Trying" for example. I'm still trying to undue the influence of 50 Cent in my school.

Just something to think about.

Superman, Kanye West and Jesus

I have a good buddy who got kind of upset the other day when he saw the preview for Superman. In that 30-second preview, the voiceover said the following words.

"Even though you have been raised as a human being, you are not one of them. They could be a great people…they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you, my only son.”

You can see the trailer here

That language is deliberate, he blogged, and it rubbed him the wrong way. Johnny Gill in reverse, I guess.

His reasons made sense to me, and although I haven't had the chance to talk to him about it yet, I would say that I didn't get that same feeling. My first thought was "Wow, another way to work Jesus into the mix." Just like the Spiderman movies had a lot of spiritual language and issues that pastors everywhere could draw out and talk about, Superman's probably going to have the same thing. And this summer, our church is doing a "SuperHero" theme, which is about heroes in the OT, so that'll make for good social inertia. Plus, if you're going to compare someone to Jesus Christ, Superman is a good pick. I can see the Messianic themes there. And if my son grows up making slight connections between Superman and Jesus, then I'm okay with that.

What I'm not okay with - and this is something that kind of really does rub me the wrong way - is people thinking that Kanye West is Jesus. In the newest edition of Rolling Stone, Kanye West is done up and posed to look like Jesus Christ.



The story about it is here.

The AP Wires say that the strangest tangent of the Rolling Stone story, however, is when West says he's addicted to pornography. He remembers first seeing his father's Playboy magazine when he was 5 years old.

"Right then," West says, laughing, "it was like, `Houston, we have a problem.'"

Yeah. That's JUST like Jesus.

Having a Bad Day? Not anymore, you aren't!

Here's some instant joy from my son, Justus.


Here's some more. Smiles for eva-body.

Lost about Lost

Okay, I admit it. I'm an addict. ABC's hit show Lost has me by the larynx and it's squeezing. I love the show. And I'm dying to talk about it with someone, but I can't find a good discussion board. So if you know of one, let me know. Secondly, if you know, or think you know, the answers to any of the following questions, please chime in:



Question 1. Where the heck did Desmond, the guy in the bunker go? Did he just run off into the jungle and decide to live in a tree and eat mangos?

Question 2. What about Danielle, the french chick? Where did she disappear to? After being alone for 17 years, you'd think she'd welcome the human interaction.

Question 3. Is it my imagination, or did Sawyer shoot at Zeke last night, and did the bullet somehow ricochet off? Zeke must have some electromagnetic force field, or something. He looked awfully West Virginia to be able to come up with that kind of technology, if you know what I mean.

Question 4. Why aren't people constantly discussing what they know. You'd think they'd be having weekly pow-wows to share info, especially the new folks, like Ana Lucia and Mr. Eko. Sawyer, Locke and Jack go into the jungle, get shot at by some weird Hillbilly, don't find Michael, learn that there are other inhabitants, perhaps dozens of them, who threaten to kill both Kate and you. And then they return, and just go to the beach, sit down and sip some water. What? Why isn't everyone running up to them asking what they saw/found? It makes no sense. Is hanging up tarps on tree branches really taking that much of their time?

Question 5. Jack wants to train an army. There's a metaphor in this, I suppose. Kind of like in The Iliad. Troy was a center of learning, religion and peace, and then the Mycenaens showed up with lots of boats and lots of spears, and because Troy didn't have a big enough military, they were completely destroyed, culminating in the great statesman's Hector's infant son being tossed off the city walls and Cassandra being raped in the temple. I'm not a big fan of wars, but I understand that evil is a fact of life, and sometimes it's best to walk with a big stick. But still, this is turning a bit into Lord of the Flies. I just hope this time, Piggy doesn't die.

Question 6. How many people do you know who have killed someone? Right. Probably not a lot. But on Lost, like 8 out of 13 people have purposely, directly killed someone. That seems a bit extreme, even for TV. It's an island of murderers. Ana Lucia leads the pack with three murders thus far, though Eko probably has a higher tally from his former life as a Nigerian Drug Lord. And you could say that Jack's hubris killed the Old Italian Tumor Guy. You could. It might not be fair, but you could say it.

and finally...

Question 7. What's the deal with the black, swirling smoke. Did you see pictures inside it, or was that just me? Is this some sort of miliary technology? Smoke reconnaissance? Weird.

What's a Meta For?

So I have been thinking about this, mainly from my conversations with a buddy of mine, Jeff about the spiritual life. And I'm starting to form a metaphor, which I think was more clearly articulated by Brennan Manning in a book I skimmed through in which he compares the Christian life to the Wild, Wild West. But I can't remember that book's title.

Point 1: Life = Jungle
I think getting to know God is like trying to find your way in a jungle. It's dark. It's mysterious. It's confusing. And it's dangerous, almost hostile at times.

Point 2: Bible = Map of the Jungle
You have a map (the Bible), which helps, but only if you study it. And that's hard because the Bible isn't as easy to read as a map. And even then, maps are very different than looking at and being in the real thing. Maps don't indicate where trees are, or where the tigers are, for that matter.

Point 3: Tigers, Angry Pygmies, Snakes, etc = Temptations
Pretty self-explanatory

Point 4: English-speaking Jungle Native who's befriended you = Holy Spirit
Knows the territory inside and out. Acts like a scout, and goes out before you, while you're in camp, to determine which way to go. But the guide is weird, because it seems like he goes out and then comes back in two days all dirty saying, "This way, and quick." And you're like, "Why?" and he's like, "I don't have time to explain."

Point 5: Community of Believers = Other Adventurers
We also need other adventures, just to talk about all this. Sometimes other people see things we don't, and that can help. And most of the time, we need each other to remind ourselves that we're not crazy, insane, or just making this whole thing up. That's part of my role, as a pastor - to remind people that in their search for God and Jesus, that honestly, we're not all crazy.

Point 6: Hidden Bunkers, Filled with Supplies = Writings of Christians Who Went Before Us
They're no longer around - but they were deep enough in the jungle to know what others would need. So they made a shanty, covered it in vines, and left supplies (like batteries, fresh water, canned food, ammunition, pantyhose, etc) to help us trudge further than they were able to go. It's what they would have wanted.


Here's what I'm missing. Where does Jesus fit into all this. Also, God the father. Revise, discuss, expand. I'm not the King of Metaphors, and I'm interested to hear what you think.

Neighbor Moving...

My neighbor Robert is moving, which is sad, because he's a cool guy and a great neighbor. I never really got a chance to really, really bond with the guy, which sucks. He's an amazing gardener - you should see his backyard. It looks like a model for a Japanese garden or something. Ponds, flowing water, manicured plants.

Anyway, he's selling his place, which is on a corner lot, for $740,000.

That's a quarter of a million dollars. A quarter of a million dollars. Amazing.

Pretty Funny Sermon Intro...

Folks I know and trust have told me this was one of my funniest openers of any sermon I've ever given. Now, I'm not all about the funnies, but I do think that church should be a place to laugh. Joy isn't just a dishwashing detergent: it's a fruit of the Spirit, people.

Special thanks to Nick Swardson, a comedian whose insights into life with his grandmother started me thinking about all this stuff. And extra special thansk to Nicole's family, a cast of zany characters who inspired these stories. If you're having a bad day, I hope the first two tracks of this message make you laugh.

Track 01
Track 02

For the rest of the sermon, you can get that here.
Track 03
Track 04
Track 05
Track 06
Track 07
Track 08
Track 09

Like "The Onion?" You'll love Larknews.

So my buddy Eric from Ohio emailed me this link (shout out to Ohio). This is hilarious. It's a parody site that makes fun of some of the more laughable elements of modern Christianity. It's funny.

Click here to check it out.

Madison Tieche: 1997-2006

Today was our last day with our beloved family cat, Madison. It ended a long and difficult illness that left Madison weighing less than 5 pounds, a walking skeleton that bore little resemblance to the big, strong frame that earned him the nickname "Linebacker Kitty."

Madison's liver began failing over the Christmas Break, and he began expunging thick, yellow bile from his urinary tract. He was doing it uncontrollably, and soaked the comforter and carpet in the guest bedroom. It upset us not because it was a big mess (which it was - more than a gallon of the stuff, I estimate) but because it meant that something was really wrong with Madison.

On Monday afteroon, Nicole and I took him to the vet. Blood tests confirmed that his liver was failing. The whites of his eyes were yellow, as were his gums, his nails and his skin, which the vet indicated as signs of acute liver failure. He hadn't eaten in 3.5 weeks and hadn't had any intestinal activity in a month, and had lost 8 pounds, so the doctor said he was just going to starve himself to death. In a tough decision, Nicole and I decided to put Madison down, rather than watch him starve himself to death slowly.

We pet him a few last times, and Justus began crying, probably because Nicole and I were crying and he sensed that it was a sad time for Mommy and Daddy. He died peacefully at 5:11. He was 9 and a half years old.

I have been allergic to cats all my life, and I always joked about hating cats, but Madison went with Nicole, and because I loved her, I loved him. I took allergy medicine so I could be around him, and I never regretted it one day.

I hope I'll see him when Jesus brings the New Heaven and the New Earth down, and perfection reigns and sin, disease and death are erased. I figure God must love animals to have spent so much time creating them with such uniqueness. If I do see Madison, hr'll have his linebacker body back. I'm sure I'll be a little teary when I see him, only this time, it won't be because of allergies.

Chronic(what)cles of Narnia...

This is one of the funniest things I've seen this year and I'm not exaggerating. The DUI stop was funny, but this video from SNL is sheer genius.

Mr. Pibb + Red Vines = Crazy Delicious

You can go to iTunes to download it, or you can click here or here if you don't have iTunes.