I'm Ape for Phil Collins...

Thanks to my buddy Josh Shipp for forwarding me this video.

It's great.

Click here to see it.

Back to School

Author's Note: I was going through my old files and found this from from my first year of teaching. It was written on my third week as a teacher. Mike L. was suspended and expelled - not because he made terrorist threats in jest but because Mike burned all his bridges with those in authority. Still, I stand by my position, I think. And stand by my continual insistence that the school system, as is, is fundamentally unable to deal with the issue of character - only behavior. Which is why my friends who are educators (and who know something about character development) as so crucial. So cheers, to Ken, Scott, Jeff and Mel.

GUIDANCE/BEHAVIOR REPORT for Mike L.

Today, at about 2:30 p.m., I was given a form to fill out by the San Jose Unified School district in which I was supposed to list all the things I have observed in the three weeks that I’ve been teaching Mike L.

Apparently, Mike’s facing expulsion from the school for reasons I’m not sure I understand, but think go something like this: he was walking down the halls, boasting that he was going to “blow the school up” and a concerned student or two decided to tell their teacher about the incident, who in turn told the vice-principals, who in turn investigated. And now I’m here, trying to fill out a form about how and why Mike L. should be expelled.

And the form is easy to fill out. Heck, it practically writes itself. Under “achievement” I could write volumes about how Mike is a classic underachiever. He not only doesn’t do his homework, or do the out of class reading, but even getting him to do the in-class activities is like trying to get a pencil to bleed. The best-case scenario with Mike is that he’ll just sit there, staring ahead, saying nothing, fiddling with his pen. I can’t force Mike to write in his journal, or take a quiz seriously, or read the handout, and he’s certainly seemingly unwilling to put forth the effort.

His relationships with other students are strained. His loudness disrupts the whole classroom, and a lot of the students resent the way he turns the order and structure of the class into mumbled chaos. He doesn’t work well in groups at all, from what I’ve observed, because it seems nearly impossible for him to focus on anything for more than 4 seconds. The only time he opens his mouth to say something in class is either to draw attention to himself or insult a classmate. His language is laced with wildly inappropriate profanity and comments.

But here’s the problem. I can say all of those things (and they’re all true) but I don’t think any of those are reasons to expel him. The first thing that hops through my mind when I see Mike acting up again is not, “What’s wrong with this kid,” but instead, “What is this kid trying to get.”

Mike L. has a bigger personality than anyone I’ve ever met. He takes over every room he’s in. He’s disruptive, inappropriate and loud. But he isn’t complex. He’s not evil, or malicious. I don’t imagine he sits in his room masterminding diabolical plots. He’s a kid - a scared little boy who yells and screams because he’s dying inside- dying for attention, dying for someone to listen to him, dying for lots of things.

It's true - Mike L. makes very poor life choices. But I don’t know if this is the best way to rehabilitate Mike L. What are we trying to show him? Confirm the sinking knowledge that he’s had that in this school are a set of adults who are just waiting to get him out of their hair? That the school district he’s in is filled with people who can’t wait to shove him off to another district?

Mike needs to learn a lot of lessons about what it means to be a man, an adult. He needs to learn to stop feeling sorry for himself. He needs to learn that his life’s path will consist of the choices that he’s making every single day.

I agree with all of those lessons. But my fear is that this expulsion will not teach Mike those lessons, and that instead, he will learn about what it’s like to have adults point the finger, blame him, scold him and tell him what a mess-up he is.

And I’m pretty sure that’s one lesson he doesn’t need to learn again.

Justice!

There was a show on a few years back called "The Equalizer." The Equalizer (Robert McCall) is a former agent of a shadowy, unnamed government agency, who is trying to make up for the unspoken sins of his past. His atonement comes in the form of an advertisement in the New York Yellow Pages that features this quote - "GOT A PROBLEM? ODDS AGAINST YOU? CALL THE EQUALIZER!"

I don't remember much about the show, but I do remember that at the end of every show, the bad guy really got what was coming for him.

There's something intensely satisfying about this.

Which is why I nearly cheered when I read this story. The US State Department has changed its rules for passport acquisition. Now, it will deny a passport to any non-custodial parent who owes more than $2,500 in child support. To get a passport, you have to pay.

In all, states have reported collecting at least $22.5 million through the program thus far in 2007. The money is then forwarded to the parent to whom it is owed.

"For us, it's been amazing to see how people who owe back child support seem to be able to come up with good chunks of money when it involves needing their passport," said Adolfo Capestany, spokesman for the state of Washington's Division of Child Support. "Folks will do anything to get that passport, so it is a good collection tool."

Finally, mothers and children who have been abandoned by the father get some recompense. The Equilizer would be proud.

You can read the story here.

Idolize Sports Much?

So I'm a mild baseball fan. And since I live in the Bay Area, let me tell you, the hype surrounding Barry Bonds' quest to break Hank Aaron's all-time home run record really has reached a fever pitch (haha, get it. Pitch. Baseball. Anyway).

But the day Bonds tied Aaron, this was the headline at ESPN.com.

Bonds Moves Into Eternity; Assumes MLB Home Run Record.

Umm.

Eternity.

Really?

Eternity?

I mean, I'm all for hyperbolic sports headlines, but come on. First of all, theologically, I'm not sure there's any religion that has a God who values hitting baseballs enough to grant eternal life. But even in terms of human history, this is hardly on the scale of say, the Incans inventing a calendar or the Roman aqueduct engineering.

Sheesh.